Match Report: Barbs A vs Strollers

On a chilly, wet and windy day in the middle of April two teams came together looking for local bragging rights. The Strollers, a long established side in the IFFC who have experienced the highest highs over recent years, came up against the Barbarians A, a newish team that is working hard to find their feet in their inaugural season in the IFFC’s top flight. The form book suggested that the Strollers would hold the cards, but the Barbs were determined to make sure that in a good ol’ cliche kind a way the form book was nowhere to be seen! Turning up with both breakfast and beer in hand, the Barbs were clearly up for this game long before the whistle blew….

When it did finally blow, the Barbs were straight at the opposition. Controlling the opening period the Barbs midfield set the pace for the game. Cpt. Keith was winning everything in the air, while Luc was running his ass off as he always did. Out wide, Tobias was enjoying his new role on the left while over on the right, Chairman Green was filling in for the absent Mr Arnold and what an instrumental move it was by the Barbs manager, Richard. Chairman Green saw much of the ball in the opening minutes winning numerous free kicks following great composure and skill on the ball.

Mr Arnold was now just a distant memory and the Strollers were dazzled into submission by the new wing man’s total football. In fact it was no surprise when it was the silky Tobias cutting in from the left that led to the first goal. Mesmerizing the Strollers defence Tobias cut in and headed straight for the box, once there he fed a supreme ball across the box past the on-rushing defenders and straight into the path of Chairman Green. With a deft touch with his left foot, the Chairman brought the ball under instant control and despite the on-rushing goalkeeper, a touch with his right foot was soon followed by a powerful side foot. It sailed past the goalkeeper and into the far corner. 1-0 to the Barbarians. The build-up, the finish, it was all majestic and a certain goal of the season contender had it not been for Luc’s weapon of mass destruction that exploded in the second half. More on that later!

The only real chance that the Strollers had in the first half fell via a lucky long ball followed by a lucky bounce that somehow managed to elude the impeccable Barbarians defence. With a Stroller bearing down on goal and with no defender to stop him, Richard did what any good manager/defender would do in this position, and that was to rugby tackle the f*@k out of the striker bringing him down on the edge of the penalty area. The ref blew instantly, and while the commotion was winding down, Marcus, the clever man that he is, slid around and stood in the goal. The ref, then with a decision to make, saw that Richard was never ever the last man and picked out his yellow card, much to the despair of the Strollers.

And so, as the rain continued to fall, the Strollers tried in vain to get back in the game. But all the long balls and stray passes were never gonna be enough to break down the Barbarians and so went the half time whistle. Soaked to the skin, the Barbs were happy, playing well and winning!

The hopeless plight was helped somewhat when Manager Richard decided to help them out. Being the nice gentleman that he is, he clearly felt sorry for the Strollers. And so, with reckless gusto he lunged in from behind scything down the Strollers forward earning himself a second yellow card in the process. Bye Bye Richard! (HAHA!!! – Only joking mate, it was of course the worst sendings off in the history of modern football. It was never a booking, never a foul, and you should have been handed a medal for a life saving tackle. Boo Hoo to that useless excuse for a ref!)

Anyhoo, despite being down to 10 men for the final 25 minutes it was Christoph playing up front on his own for the Barbs that came closest to scoring, swivelling on a dime to smack his shot off the bar and away to safety.

The Barbarians then continued to defend like troopers and held out with the Strollers continuing to think that long cross-field balls out in to touch were the way to win a game… oh my, thinking it about it, it’s embarrassing we only won by one goal. Shame on you!